Way to go in consulting

It is my second consulting gigs, and I have begun to identify the areas where I am lacking skills. The realization comes as a mixed blessing. It is depressing because I have a long way to go before assembling the whole skill kit, but it is liberating because it excites me to move forward with a fighting spirit.

If my personal history is any indication, this is very good. I have a tendency to get complacent without pressure. When I went to college, I faced a cultural shock: the communication in mandarin, the communal living with 5 other people, the sudden change of expectation from a child to an adult, the beginning of counting romantic relationship not as a damaging evil, but as some trophy you brag about... For the first two years, I felt I never really fit in. But you know what, looking back, I made great effort in trying to fit in, and I was okay in the end. The same process happened in my first two years of overseas experiences. Then I spent the next five years without too much pressure (or with insignificant pressure that I thought was a big deal at that time). It is deceiving to live in the bubble of an ivory tower. Looking out, you feel you are above it all, but real life takes more stamina than finishing a dissertation, which I was whining about for little reason(see my previous blogs for apparent evidence). I think now it is time again to strive to learn new stuff rather than sitting on my old cultural capital.

Before I started working, I thought I had all the skills in the world to be successful in the real world. I took pride of my sociological learning and tried to stick with it whenever I could. However, the past half a year taught me something else. I have realized two important things. 1) I am usually not the smartest kid in the room. 2) If I stick with my current job, I will be able to learn my way to be as smart as I want to be. While I still takes pride of my academic soul, I think it is time for it to take a back seat and give more open-mindedness to all the other "cheaper" and "shallower" knowledge.

So what is the moral of story? Well, in the end, it is not really about work, it is able to be better than an old me. Work skills eventually translates into life experiences, and I want to be a better person. To my readers, this conclusion looks eerily similar to my last post's punch line. My hat off to this. It is not an intelligent design. It just happens this way.

Cercil (continued)

Remember My Crush IV? I bet you do, right? It was a surprise for me last month through a mutual friend to find out that Cercil resides in the city with me now. Yesterday I went up town to meet her on her campus. We have not seen each other for 18 months, so there was a lot to catch up.

We met in a coffee shop at 3pm. Since the weather was nice, we walked along Charles River and chatted as any other long-time friends. She told me that she had some retina problem in her left eye about 1 year ago, so she had to go through a surgery. While recovering from it, she decided to apply for graduate schools, putting the dream of a dancer aside for now. Of course she got into some top programs, and here she is, in the same city with me. I was thrilled to see her, as you can imagine. We are two long-lost friends who are separated and reunited by fate, and I felt such ease just talking to her, finding out what she went through, imaging her new life in a new city, and of course, fantasizing the chance that the fate has so favorably bestowed on me.

we finished walking along the river and then she showed me her office. It was cool to revisit a graduate student life, from which I just escaped happily but for which I inevitably missed from time to time. She was in an art program, so there was designs, models, drawings, portfolios and junks all over the place. We chatted about the past, our dancing career, whereabouts of our favorite persons we both know, facebook, travel plan, anything. Once a while, her classmates (it was a giant open space and everything sees everyone from a distance) would stop by and have the most random conversation. Two of her classmates show obvious affection towards her. Not a surprise to me.

We chatted about 2 and a half hours. It feels short, and I really want to see her again some time soon. Needless to say, my feeling towards her is rather complicated. On the one hand, we are still very good friends, and I hope this friendship will last forever. On the other hand, I cannot stop thinking about asking her out for a date soon. But regardless, meeting with her today yesterday instilled me with a purpose, big or small. I remember a line from a movie and here is the paraphrase, "knowing you makes me want to be a better person." That is exactly how I feel today.