My friend (Alphabbq)

I have to write this one down for now, because if I wait until tomorrow (well, it is actually today, because It has passed midnight) to read Alphabbq’s blog, it is definitely going to change what I want to say about her.

How should I start? I do not know. Meeting her in this city is so random. I went to Tianjin to her Talldeep, and then got a phone number of a friend, and then I called the friend and got Alphabbq’s phone number. Then I came to this city and now saw her for the first time in 5 and a half years. It is quite amazing that we still meet each other after such a long time. Thinking back, I was never a good friend of her before, except that we were in the drama club together, and except that she helped me land a part-time job in CCTV.

If everyone can be described as an object, her object will be a piece of crystal glass. For three reasons. One, glass is transparent. Second, glass reflects whatever it takes in and is not judgmental. And third, crystal glass is fragile.

I hung out with her for two days in the city with her. I had a lot of fun, and never felt bored when we were together. And I also realized that I have known so much of her already in these two days. Sometimes I feel I had a hard time to communicate with people. One type of people do not like to talk at all, so what can I do? The other type like to talk a lot, but they are talking about their theories, their ideas, their rational thoughts about the world. And I hate this kind of boring conversation very much.

Alphabbq is different. She would think of some random experiences and then just say it out. She never judged whatever I say or whatever I do, so I feel liberated to tell her everything. For example, she is the first person to whom I talked about my two failed pursuit of Asian-American girls and my recent love interest of Zexum (Of course, through emails I have told a couple of my good friends. But in person-to-person interactions, Alphabbq really put me at ease). I also told her my past confusion about whether I am homosexual and showed her how I turned 360 degrees around the pole on the train, and I did not feel embarrassed. Being with her reminded me that I was such a kid indeed. In fact, these two days reminded me the time I spent with my one and only girlfriend 7 years ago (In Beijing, when I met with that girl, even she could not remind me the past golden time, because both she and I have changed so much). I was about to tell Alphabbq that, but when I asked her about her boyfriend problem, she seemed to be a little defensive. So I just let it pass to avoid any misunderstandings. But in case she will read my blog, then she will know, and I believe that she will just take it as its face value and do not judge what I mean here.

When we entered a music store tonight, I immediately realized that she loves music. She could stay in front of one CD station for a long time, just to sample different music. So I got a gift idea for her. I bought her a CD of “X&Y” by Coldplay. I never really liked Coldplay’s this third album. But these two days, when I took the train to meet her, my ipod without an exception played the band’s first two albums, which I liked very much. So I know the gift has to be Coldplay’s. But the music store does not seem to have these two albums, so I got “X&Y”. I think she was happy when she got my gift. After hugging her goodbye in the train station, I played “X&Y” all the way back. Actually, it IS a decent album. Well, I guess sometimes I like things not just because these things are of the highest artistic quality, but also because these items represent a connection to my friends.

Fragile? What do I mean here? Well, I am not really sure myself. I told her that I liked to learn to tell fates by looking at people’s faces. Most of times, I would be quite sure what kind of life people would lead, even if later my judgment turned out to be wrong. But Alphabbq’s fate seems to be a big “Depends”. Her personality is very precious and very utopian. When I talked to her, I felt that I am beyond the secular life and I enjoyed the feeling very much. But at the same time, I also understand that this personality is not very adaptable to the real world. I guess that’s what I mean by fragile. If she has a large group of friends that appreciated her style as a supportive network, she will be doing great in the future. Still idealistic, never compromise and making great documentaries. However, if the people around her turned out to be some stupid secular persons (I hate these people, as these people make me feel inadequate while wasting my time to adjust according to them), then she would have a hard time too.

Well, these two days are amazing. Alphabbq and I definitely had a connection, because we could understand each other just like two friends who have already known each other for a long long time. Sometimes I feel the connection got a little bit intimate. And I guess I really want to be part of her supportive network, and she will be mine too. And I guess I will put her blog under my bookmark link so that I can get her updates once a while.

And besides, crystal glass is the best metaphor I had for my friends. Nothing could fit her any better. And now, when I am ready to sleep, I cannot wait until tomorrow to read how she described our meetings in her blog. Good night.