A dream and Happy Birthday to my friend Jegal

I usually do not write about my dreams, not because I do not want, but because I usually forget them all, despite the facts I know I had a lot of dreams.
Last night is the same. A lot of dreams, and I can remember one very well. It was in an elevator of a very tall building. No walls around the elevator, so I could look down to see how high it went. I was with a group of people, but I forgot who they were. Anyway, the elevator brought us very high, and I began to realize the steel chain holding the elevator was cracking. I had to use my hands to hold it, while thinking, "oh, shit.".... Well, that's the dream.
Happy birthday to my friend Jegal today. Now it is perfect time to blog about you, Jegal, and sorry for this strange name, but "J" does not go along with anything.
I met Jegal while in college. He was sensitive and intelligent. Maybe we are friends just because they were similar to some extent. Our conversation sorta have a formula, starting from our college experience but soon it would upgrade into very abstract talks about life phylosophy. Well, I no longer like this kind of bullshiting conversation. However, looking back, it was nice to have someone to resonate my thoughts. Maybe he hated it that time already, but he was one of the few that tolerated it and kept me unnoticed. He came to the US last year, to study sociology in a small town of Indiana. His wife just got pragnent. I visited them during the spring break.
But besides that, I hardly can think of any reasons why we get that close as we did. Yes, I directed a short play casting him with a small role. Yes, he consulted me a lot about going abroad. Yes, he helped me to deal with my university while I was in the US. But all these are quite trivial, and I will say the friendship might just a good accident. By this, I am not diminishing our friendship. Not at all, I value that very much. Jegal is one of first few who knew my depressing quarter and sincerely invited me to his small town for a vacation to shaking off all the bad things happened to me. I confided him with things I usually kept from my other friends. The mystery of the forming of the friendship made me feel lucky.
I think Jagel might be one of the readers of the blog, but I am still going to write the following to keep my blog's honesty. He has an ideal image about me (Sometimes I feel that's the reason why he valued the friendship so much). He might think I am smart, cynical, ambitious, adventuous, and open-minded. I feel a lot of times he looked up to me. It put me in an awkward position because I was led to act in a way to confirm the expectation. Maybe he is right, but chances are he is wrong. So some day he might be disappointed by my imperfections, lots of it.
Well, that's a problem I had with a lot of my old friends. I liked to perform in a way to present the best of me in the past. Now I am a more honest person in showing who I am, but my old friends, you will know I am just one of the "little people", just like you. No aura, no capacity of teleporting, no solutions for every problem, having strange dreams sometimes, confused about life sometimes, afraid of being alone, and not able to achieve as high as I want. One day you all will know.......